Hello everyone! For the month of February I have been trying to raise money for the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit at the Saskatoon Royal University Hospital through sales of my February calendar photo. If you recall, I took the photo during my calendar project in 2014 after my nephew’s passing. Oliver was born premature and had spent his short life in the hospital — I will make the donation in his name. My nephew, August, was born premature last year and was also taken care of in the NICU. Today he is a healthy baby, living at home with his Mom, Dad, and big brother Odin.
So this is how redbubble works; each product they sell has a set manufacturing fee, and the artist can set their margin — the default is 20% (as is my own). Every cent I make from sales of “February (for the little ones)” will go to the NICU in the beginning of March. The photo is available on many different products, all of which are very well made. If you are interested in helping, as well as owning a unique product, please check it out in my redbubble shop at http://ashleyloseth.redbubble.com !
As always, your support is greatly appreciated! ^-^
It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything at all, so I just decided to briefly update everyone on what’s up with me. I am still very much in love with photography, but still not sure what I love to photograph style-wise. What is my look? And do I even like it? I realize the saying “every artist is their own worst critic” is at least 98-99% true, and I am no exception. Is there any part of me left that even enjoys portraits anymore? At this point, I have no answer. That’s why I no longer advertise my willingness to take portraits — I’m just not willing. Inspiration does come back in waves, but each time it goes, a smaller piece is left behind. I hoped the calendar project would cure this. I hoped having actual studio gear would solve some issues. And I hoped buying my new camera would help bring me back to life. Maybe these things are helping in minuscule ways that may build up over time, but I suppose it’s too soon to say. I have yet to post a single photo from my new camera. This is the first time I’ve even mentioned it. The thing is, I don’t have any intention of making photography a career. I’m nowhere near where I want to be, and even if I get there, I think it will always be a hobby for me. And that’s a good thing. A hobby is something I can be passionate about, but let it rest when I need to. A job is something I need in order to survive. Every time I hear someone say I need to do what I love for a living, or hear that quote saying I will never work a day in my life, I feel worse. I feel guilty. I wonder if I even love it at all. And I do, but anyone alive is subject to doubt.
I find hope in artists like Ken, of Pursuing Wabi and Hai of Notes of Nomads. The reason is simple: their work, though quite different, is free. I found them both because of Japan, but that’s not why I follow them now. It’s not even the travels they document that make them free. There is no explaining it, really. The word, “free” is all you need. I find hope in them, because I see in their work traces of my own mind. Which brings me back to the question — What is my look? What is my style? Following several different photographers gives me hope as much as it can stunt me*. Ken embraces “happy accidents” — he told me this once, when I commented about a picture that was so wonderful you actually feel the heat of it. It was in the colours, the saturation, and the blur. When I see similar accidents, I tend to discard them. Even if I like them. I am bound by the fear of others not understanding. Whether or not others actually like it is irrelevant. I value criticism when it is productive, but it rarely ever is, so I’d rather avoid it. I do this subconsciously and I’ve only noticed recently. So by following those who are not afraid of what they like — or at least try not to be — I am left with the hope that I can be unafraid as well.
Finally, I want to thank those of you continuing to follow me, despite my lack of content. I do have quite a bit to write about/pictures to post in the future. In some cases I just have to find the words.
*By stunt me, I just mean that stunning imagery and talent can make that self-criticism creep out. It’s not always a setback, but can be if I let it.
My calendar is officially done! You can check it out here in my redbubble shop. I’m much happier with the result than I thought I’d be ^-^
I’ve been taking my calendar photos every month, but putting off posting (obviously) 😦 There’s really no reason for it, I’m just a horrible procrastinator and photo-chooser. To be honest there are a couple I’m not fond of at all.. partly because I’ve been staring at them for so long, and because most months were forced due to total lack of inspiration (and time off work). So without further ado, here is the last of my project photos!
November and March are my least favourite over all; whereas, February and December are the two I’m most proud of. One because it fuels my heart and the other, my need for nostalgia. I’m both sad and happy that my project is finished. I chose to do it in order to challenge myself and some months that’s more than what it was… but in the end I’m glad I did it and I think I can be proud of the result!
I also realized today that I never posted January’s photo! I completely forgot! So here it is — the final (and first) piece…
You’ll be able to find the calendar in my redbubble shop very soon!!
Finally! I meant to have these up hours ago!
These are both a little green. You may have noticed that I love nature photos… but I did try not to repeat the same pattern every month. I thought Spring and Summer would be easy, but after a while every leaf (branch, cloud, garden gnome.. etc) starts to look the same, even if they are drastically different in reality. Anyway, here they are…
June – Lady bug
I definitely prefer June out of the two. I got a lot of photos in July, but most of the time I was experimenting and not really liking what I was coming up with. I like this one, but I wish I could have gotten a good picture of the blue jay I was stalking that day… oh well!
I haven’t seen Freyja in far too long and I miss her like crazy! She’s so cute, and looks more and more like my Grandma every time my sister shares a picture, which makes me smile. I took these photos the week we met, back in September. It was a crazy and kind of scary week, but this photo shoot helped boost morale quite a bit. It’s hard to believe she’s already one year old!!
She looks even more like Grandma when she smiles ^-^
It took me until today to pick my April photo, and it was one I almost overlooked. I have mentioned once (or twice) that I like to point my camera at the sun and see what I get. Well that’s what I did, and this is what I got…
I actually got a few robin photos that day, but they didn’t really turn out so I will be trying again and again this summer! That’s why it took me so long to decide. I couldn’t commit to one of them, but had a hard time letting them go.
As for May… well, Shea and I went to Toronto to see ONE OK ROCK (ugh, so good!) and went for a short photo walk the next day. Oddly enough, the photos that kept popping out at me are not obvious Toronto shots — but that’s ok with me. It rained off and on throughout our trip, so I was blessed to find these raindrop covered shrubs outside the Allan Gardens Conservatory.
The March photo was a tough one for me — not because I lacked inspiration, but because I had to choose between two completely opposite concepts. One featured a giant cat made of snow and the other, a lucky charm. I have decided to go with the charm. And here it is…
My original plan for February had something to do with snow and love, but an image popped into my head one day and I knew I had to make it happen. February started with sadness and I wanted to do something in Ollie’s memory. I posted one picture on my personal facebook page last night and it seems that people understood what I was trying to say. That was just one ribbon — in total there were five. This is what it looked like…
I actually pictured all blue ribbons, but then decided to put some pink in there too.
This is for Oliver, Troy and all other little ones who have left us too soon.
All month I have been toying with the idea of doing a calendar project inspired by my favourite variety show (Sekai no Hate Made ItteQ!), in which they take a photo every month for a calendar they sell at the end of the year. I won’t be going on adventures all over the world like they do, but I like the basic idea. Of course I couldn’t make up my mind until today, so I have basically missed out on January… but I’ll still head out in the dark and try to top my favourite winter shot (Frosted Tips). Now off I go — hopefully this works out!